While posting my Hans Matheson picspam last night, I noticed that I hadn't updated my LJ in three weeks ... real life has been unbearably busy. So, here a general update on interesting and not interesting stuff.
click for rambling )
Author's note: I had this really weird assignment for one of my literature classes: we were supposed to write the first page of a novel. About just anything we want. Now usually I can't write like that, but this time Hellstrom just took over my head and I wrote ... about him. Now obviously I didn't mention his name or anything, but every Basterds fan will recognise Major Creeper in this. I'd feel tempted to continue this if I had the slightest idea what was going to happen next. If you have any ideas, let me know. So, yes, while this is not fanfiction in the strictest sense, it is in fact about Major Hellstrom, so I thought people might want to read it.


Thin fingers pushed up the sleeve of his coat, pale blue eyes glanced at his watch for the first time. His contact was two minutes late.

Nothing unusual about that. It could happen, even to the most reliable people. None of his colleagues would even waste a thought on this.

But the Colonel wouldn’t have sent him, his best man, if this were a situation one of his colleagues could deal with. And he had been long enough in this line of work to trust his instincts - something was amiss.

He was still relaxed, though. He felt the comforting weight of his twin guns in the shoulder-holsters, hidden under his coat, but they were not the reason for his calm. Although he was an excellent shot, he had hardly killed anyone in all these years. At least not personally. He had always relied more on his brain than on his admittedly quick hands. It was more efficient. More cultivated, too. Shooting people made such a mess, it was a task better left to soldiers.

He leant back on the bench, breathing in the fresh spring air. Fumbled for his cigarettes, lit one, and flipped the match to the ground. Took a greedy drag on the cigarette as if he hadn’t had one in days, although the last one had been less than an hour ago. The Colonel always said that he smoked too much. The old dog would look almost concerned then, as if he cared about his well-being. A snort. That manipulative bastard didn’t know any more about affection and caring than he himself did; he simply didn’t want to lose his best man.

Five minutes. The cigarette stub was dropped to the ground and crushed beneath a boot heel. Five minutes late. Still within the limits of the acceptable, but bordering on the unusual. People knew better than to be late when dealing with the Colonel.

He sighed. He could be a very patient man, but he hated inaction. The sun had already set before he had arrived, and it was getting cold. Mothers with their children and young couples in summer clothes quickly left the park, laughing, talking, playing. Normal people. A sneer.

He lit another cigarette. He was getting annoyed. Damn it, he wasn’t some messenger boy one could keep waiting in the cold. That contact better had a good excuse when he arrived, or else he would make sure that this scum would meet his less sophisticated colleagues. The ones who thought whips were an appropriate means of communication. His lips curled in disdain. Brutes, but they had their uses.

His eyes darted around, but he didn’t notice anything suspicious. The contact was supposed to find him, not the other way around. The rendezvous point had been unambiguous, there could be no misunderstanding.

Fifteen minutes. The third cigarette. As the stub joined its two brothers on the ground, he got up. He had waited long enough. Nobody was fifteen minutes late on a meeting set up by the Colonel. It meant that things weren’t amiss.

They were really fucked up.

Yes, I finished it the night before I have to hand it in, after pushing it off for over two months. It's not great, but it's acceptable. But most importantly - IT'S DONE!!! I spent the past week with pretty much nothing else but this goddamn paper. Wow. I'm so relieved.

Now that it's done, I also feel free to tell you that I aced all my other exams last term (in July). Yay me! My classes will start again on Wednesday.

Now there are so many fanfics demanding to be written! Expect some Christoph/Eli porn soon, as well as chapter two of La musica delle parole, as well as another Hellstrom/Landa fic. Maybe some Landa/Zoller, if I feel like it. We'll see.

Life is fucking good right now.
For some reason Tiamat turned out to be the most inspiring Eric/Godric-band ever. Pity I only like about two of their albums. ;) Still, it helps. Maybe because Johan Edlund has one of the sexiest voices in metal. Or maybe I just subconsciously associate a Swedish band with Eric. Or it's really just their amazing lyrics. Aaaaah. Should go back to writing instead of rambling and headbanging alone in my room like the metal nerd I am. ;)

Btw, I officially apologise to all my Forgotten Realms readers that I am once again neglecting FR for another fandom. Rest assured that no pairing will ever tear me away from Artemis/Zaknafein. None. It will just postpone the Kindred Spirits update a bit. Anyway, if you're complaining, that means you haven't watched True Blood yet ... otherwise you'd be happy I'm writing Eric/Godric. ;)

In the annoying thing called real life ... I finally got a couple of books that might be useful for that stupid paper I still have to write, but I haven't started reading them yet. I have to write about 15 pages about Sartre's autobiography Les mots (a wonderful book, mind you). I haven't even decided on what exactly I am going to write about, let alone started writing. I should really get started, because I want to finish it before I go on holidays (in about a month ...).

But first ... I want to finish the sequel to Father tonight. Called Brother. I'm so creative. -.- Did I ever mention that I HATE choosing titles for my fics?

I could also try to go to bed before 5am for once ... I doubt I'll manage, though. ;)

linndechir: (coffee)
Lots of things have happened, good things, bad things, other things. Starting with the bad thing: my computer broke down yesterday. Fortunately I still have my laptop, but it’s very small and I can’t really watch DVDs on it. Which is all the more frustrating because I’ve got seasons 3-5 of DS9 lying on my desk, waiting to be watched … and I can’t watch them. Gnaaa. I’ve recently watched the first two seasons, and that made me remember just how much I love this show. I am going to try and find out how much it would cost me to get my old computer repaired, and then I’ll have to decide if it’s worth the money or if I will have to buy a new one. All so expensive. :(

But there’s good news, too, and I guess that’s why I’m not completely depressed. I’ve written all my exams and am currently waiting for the results. Now I just have that stupid term paper to write, and unfortunately still no idea what to write it about. Damn. But there’s even better news: I’m going on holidays in about two months! 10 days in Dublin, Edinburgh and Glasgow (I know, 10 days is a bit short for three cities, but I can’t really afford more). Yaaaay! I can’t wait to go there. If anyone knows those cities and has recommendations on what I absolutely HAVE to do/see/visit, please tell me. ^^

Apart from that, a friend introduced me to True Blood, a vampire TV series, which is surprisingly good considering that most vampire stories are complete and utter crap. And Eric so looks like an evil version of Dyon … (my OC from Coming to Terms, remember?) Hihi. I’ve finished watching season 1 and will move on to season 2 at the end of the week. I’m just sad that the fandom is still rather small. Almost no fanfics, despite the incredible canon-slashiness.

After all this babbling you don’t care about, a few words about a more interesting subject. I have about 3100 words written for the next chapter of KS. That’s rather short, compared to the chapters before that (usually 4000-6000 words). However, it feels somehow fine as a chapter, and I think the next scene would feel out of place if I added it. Especially since I haven’t finished the next scene yet and, honestly, I have some difficulties writing it. So, I’ll think about it some more, but unless I change my mind the chapter will get just a little bit more work and then go to my beta before the end of the week. Depending on how long it takes her to beta read it, the chapter should be posted rather soon. Again, it will be a rather short one, with much fluff on the one hand and drow plotting on the other hand. I will save the big Artemis-Zaknafein-Drizzt-CB-confrontation for the chapter after that. I think. This will probably change again a hundred times. ;)

Btw ... I'm really not a theme-song-person, I almost never think of characters or pairings when I listen to music. But for some reason lots of songs have become Qui/Dooku-songs in my head ... Yes, Yesterday too. Why else do you think I would listen to the Beatles? Although I really should be listening to Nothing Else Matters, my Artemis/Zak-song. ^^
linndechir: (coffee)

I'm currently extremely busy, with my exams coming up next week and the week after, and since my wrist got better (which is good) I have to work again (which is less good). I'm already very relieved that I managed to finish my story for the Party like it's 1999 ficathon in time (some pre-slashy, Mace/Obi-Wan hurt/comfort fic set after Qui-Gon's death ... and it's exactly as cheesy as it sounds), to be posted very soon. That meant putting Kindred Spirits on hold for a few days, but I should be able to get back to KS at the end of next week, after I've taken the particularly difficult exams. I will do everything I can to post the next KS-chapter before the end of July. After my exams I'll have a break until October, and while I have to write a rather important term paper during that period I will nonetheless have more free time, i.e. I will hopefully manage another couple of Forgotten Realms updates (particularly KS and Anger), and I hope that I will finally get to write at least some of the Star Wars ideas that have been distracting me for a few weeks. I might post a list of fics I am going to write in the next time (or to be more realistic: fics I want to write) soon, just in case anyone wants to know what weird stuff you can expect from me next.

Until then ... wish my luck for my exams. ^^

Oh no. Four months of freedom have come to an end. My classes started again today. So far it was okay, nothing too remarkable. I am really curious what my other classes and teachers will be like. But then again, even the horrible teachers are usually nice and not too demanding in the first week, so I'll just have to wait and see. More detailed updates on my classes next week, I guess. I'm kinda nervous, and - worse - I know that I'll have a hard time adjusting to university again. At least I only have to get up early once a week. Since I am not a morning person at all ... that's a good thing. ;) And I suppose it's also important that I finally get back to university again. I was really happy these past few months, but I'm also getting increasingly frustrated with myself. I had so much free time, and I didn't do anything. I didn't read much, I hardly wrote anything at all, I didn't start to take piano and tango lessons again like I had intended (but I will ... hopefully). Strangely enough, I only do these things when I don't have the time to do them. When I have free time, I'm lazy. When I'm stressed, I get creative. So ... with a bit of luck there might be a fanfic update in the next weeks, now that I don't have much free time anymore. ;)

I really want to write the next KS-chapter, but except for a lot of the obligatory Artemis/Zak-fluff, I'm still not sure how to continue right now. More angsting for Drizzt and Zak? Sure, but I don't want to focus too much on Drizzt's point of view. So what am I supposed to do? Write Drizzt angst from Artemis' point of view? Or Zak's? Might just be interesting ... because Drizzt angst alone is unbearable. I'm also seriously considering bringing Kimmuriel and Rai'gy back into the story. Everything is going too smooth right now. And sooner or later I'll have to give Artemis and Zak something to argue about ... i.e. the fact that Artemis hates Menzo and that Zak hates the surface. Which is slightly annoying if they want to live together. ;) But I just don't know how to do all of this, and in what order ... Gna, it's frustrating. I'm open for suggestions, if you have any. ^^
My ongoing, extremely disturbing Star Wars infatuation eating up what little bit of creativity I have at the moment is not helping. At least I won't ever be tempted to write any Qui/Obi - there are (fortunately) so many fics about them that I feel like everything has already been written, and every fic I could possibly write would probably be stealing ideas from at least three other fics at the same time. So I just waste my time reading about them. ;) Unfortunately, though, another pairing has crept into my mind ... And there are virtually no Dooku/Qui fics, it's unbelievable. A couple of gen fics about them, and the few slashy fics that exist are really weird and insane, in a bad way (at least the ones I've found so far. maybe I just haven't found the good stuff yet). The poor guys are almost as neglected as Artemis and Zak. Ah, the temptation ... *sigh* But knowing my own laziness, I probably won't write anything about those two either, just as I still haven't even started to write any Rose of the Prophet slash. I definitely need someone to kick my ass and make me write again. Any volunteers? Because I really feel like those two deserve a good, slashy, part fluffy and part angsty fic (and I mean the good kind of angst, not a simple "omfg Dooku is soooo evil he does bad things to his poor lil padawan!"). Yeah. Because they are fluffy. You don't believe me? Most people would probably argue that Artemis/Zak or Gromph/Dantrag aren't fluffy either ... Well, they're all wrong. Strangely enough, it's the tough guys who can get really fluffy if you let them. Again, I mean the good kind of fluff. ;) I'm not making any sense to anyone but myself, am I? I really need to get my ideas straight if I want to write something. I'm just insanely in love with that pairing right now. I apologise for the rant.

Oh, and the really really good news. I FINALLY finished that horrible translation I had to do. 100 pages with the probably most boring text I ever read, and I had to translate it from German to French. It took a lot of time to do it because every page was a real pain. But it's finally done, and now I only have to think of the money I will get. And as much as I hated doing it ... I don't regret it, thinking of all the stuff I will be able to afford now. Not sure what I'm going to do yet, but I have no doubts that I will find something to spend the money on. ;)
linndechir: (seal of approval)

So, I made up my mind. From April on I'm going to study at the Humboldt university. It happens to be the one that is much closer to where I live, and I had strictly no reason at all to choose the one farther away. I still have to talk to a few instructors to know which classes I have to take and which not (since some of the classes I took in France will be accepted as a sort of replacement for the classes I usually would have to take in my course here in Germany). But it looks pretty good so far. I'm almost looking forward to next term, and it looks like I'll have a few hopefully interesting classes. Anyway, I'll probably be horribly disappointed.

Mhm, still no writing. I can't really focus on Forgotten Realms at the moment. My little Star Wars infatuation is only getting stronger, and I can't get the slashy characters from Rose of the Prophet out of my head (I'm just saying ... a handsome, very passionate, wild nomad, and a cool, disciplined Black Paladin who is almost as awesome as Entreri ... who happen to be blood brothers, and the sexual tension between them is mind-blowing ... okay, I'll calm down). Oh yeah, and I'm really kinda obsessed with Liam Neeson right now. I finally went to the cinema again last Sunday and saw Taken. The plot is pretty average (teenage daughter gets kidnapped, and her father - who happens to be a former CIA-agent, lucky girl - goes and rescues her ... yeah, kinda boring), but the movie is still entertaining. Liam Neeson kicks ass and is cool (and, of course, incredibly hot), and while that doesn't make an amazing movie you want to watch again and again, it's just fun. ;) Erm, yeah... whatever. I'm rambling again. Actually I just wanted to tell you all about the university decision, but apparently I can't write a single entry without at least a bit of fangirl squeeing.

Last week I got letters from the two universites I applied to, and I was accepted at both. Yay! That means I can continue my studies next semester (from April on). I'm really relieved. Now I just have to decide which university I want to go to. One of them is much closer to where I live, which is a big advantage, but I don't want to make a decision based solely on the fact that it's more comfortable for me to get up half an hour later in morning. I have about two weeks to decide, and I really hope that I will make the right choice.

I'm not writing much at the moment, unfortunately, with work and what I pretend is a social life taking up my time ... And I have a 100 page translation to do, and since I'll be paid for it I should do it as quickly as possible. So I don't know when you can expect any fanfic updates from me.

I actually wanted to reply to many many mails tonight, but I got distracted by reading fanfics ... I finally decided to watch the Star Wars movies again in the past few days. I was never a big Star Wars fan; I always thought the movies were entertaining, but nothing more. But I wasn't as obsessed with slash yet last time I watched them ... or else I would have turned into a mindless, squeeing Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan fangirl much earlier. I'm still not any more interested in the fandom than before, but that pairing is just perfect. I guess Liam Neeson is just too much for me. No man should be allowed to be that sexy. Unless I can have him. ;) Whatever, I feel like this entry is getting increasingly useless. I should get some sleep.

First, the interesting part. I posted the prologue of a new fanfic called Secret Intimacy. It’s about Rizzen and Dinin. It won’t be slashy immediately, but soon … Yay, more slashy Do’Urden incest! ;) I see it as a kind of companion piece to The Seduction of Innocence (to which I still haven’t written the epilogue, bad Linn …). I wanted to compare the two only father-son-relationships in canon, Zaknafein and Drizzt on the one hand, and Rizzen and Dinin on the other. Okay, there’s also Rizzen and Nalfein, but we don’t know anything about them (although Nalfein might appear in Secret Intimacy, but I don’t know about that yet). The only thing we know about Rizzen and Dinin is that in Homeland Rizzen seems to be very proud of his son, in an almost … human way. Zak and Drizzt, however, are most of the time convinced that the other one is an evil hypocrite, and they usually think about killing each other. I liked the idea that two more typical, “evil” drow might have a much closer and happier relationship than the two “good” guys. That’s also why Secret Intimacy is going to be a happier, less disturbing story than The Seduction of Innocence. So, even people who didn’t like my Zak/Drizzt-story might like this. Give it a try. ^^

As for Kindred Spirits … I’m still working on chapter eleven. There are two scenes in the chapter; the first one is as good as finished, but the second one (which will be longer and much more important) is very hard to write. I’m a bit stuck and don’t really know what to do, but I got a couple of new ideas a few days ago, so maybe I’ll finally manage.

I’ve also decided that the next scene of Anger will be about Dantrag Baenre, and I already have a few ideas. Yay for Dantrag! Gotta love him.

Now, the less interesting part, I.e. my real life … Just in case anyone wants to know, I’m back in Berlin. I decided to drop out of my course in Paris a month ago because … well, mainly because the course I was in was extremely stressful and difficult, and the reasons I had once had to go through that weren’t really valid anymore. I had no motivation to continue and I felt terrible most of the time, and it’s a difficult course in which you can only succeed if you really work a lot for it. So, I decided that it was better to stop … although I know that it was probably not the most reasonable thing I’ve ever done in my life. Anyway, I’ll just continue my studies here in Berlin, as soon as possible. Can’t possibly be worse.

Yay, five of my six written exams lie behind me! Now I've only my English exam left (which is tomorrow), and while that's the one I care about most, I know that it will be less difficult for me than the other exams. I survived in one week History ("Communism in international relations from 1918 to 1953"), French Literature (something about novels and morality, I'm too lazy to translate the whole subject), Sociology ("How can the role of the middle classes in French contemporary society be described?"), Maths (you don't want to know what that was about), and today Philosophy (with the "wonderful", short and complicated subject: "La servitude", which means about the same in French as in English ;)). Damn, I'm tired and I feel like my right arm is going to fall off from too much writing. But it's almost over. I still have classes in June, but no exams anymore, except for a couple of oral exams because my professors think that oral exams are soooo much fun! Yeah, maybe, if you're the one who's asking the questions.

I'm pissed off because my mp3-player died this week. I guess I shouldn't be surprised after two and a half years of daily use, but still. My poor money. *grumble* Not to mention that I won't be able to buy a new one before July, because I'm going to buy it in Germany, where such thingies are much less expensive than in France. I will have to find a new way of ignoring everyone around me. *grin*

Then again, I'm happy because I got many many nice reviews for the
latest chapter of Kindred Spirits. :D I'm all the happier because I had so much fun writing it. I'm looking forward to writing the next chapter; I'll try to start this week, maybe even tomorrow. So many things to do. *hops around happily* Kimmuriel and Rai-Guy are making everything even more complicated, and I love complicated. In the beginning. I hate it once I have to get the characters (and myself) out of the mess again. ;) But I can promise you that I won't mess it up the way I did with Out of Control. I couldn't make my ... well, not my OTP, because it's not the only one, but one of my TTP (two true pairings ;)) ... unhappy.

Ooooh, and I've had another stupid idea for a one-shot. I was thinking of an alternative version of what happened in Coming to Terms, one in which Artemis can't accept what he wants. Just a whole lot of angst and denial and sexual frustration. I have no idea why I want to write that. It won't even have smut in it. Okay, nobody reads my stories for the smut anyway, because I can't write smut. Still. So, I have no idea if I am actually going to write that or if it is just another annoying idea that will leave me alone if I ignore it long enough. I don't know, would anybody be interested in reading something like that?
Other things to write, for those who are interested: thousand more chapters of Kindred Spirits (at some point, you are going to beg me to stop ;)), a Rizzen/Dinin-companion piece to
The Seduction of Innocence (thanks to Ziggy for giving me the idea ^^), some Jarlaxle/Zak-stuff, a short Berg'inyon-Jarlaxle scene, and some day I might just continue Of Faith and Loyalty. *chuckle* It's not that I don't want to, but I don't know where I want to go with that story. And other stories are just more important to me right now.

And I found myself more music! :) I've been listening to nothing but Kurt Weill for a few days now. If you don't know who that is; well, to make it short, he was a German and later American composer (1900-1950), who is mostly known for writing the music to Bertolt Brecht's musical theatres (The Threepenny Opera, for example), but he has also composed many other things. And some of those songs are just so beautiful. *sigh* They make me want to start taking singing classes again. I miss singing. :(



September 2017



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