linndechir | Fic: A Place to Stand (Stannis/Jon)

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Fic: A Place to Stand (Stannis/Jon)

Title: A Place to Stand
Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire
Pairing: Stannis/Jon
Words: 1007
Rating: G
Summary: They never needed words to understand each other, though Jon wasn't sure if that made it harder or easier.
A/N: Some context for this scene: this is set in a happy future in which Stannis took the Iron Throne and made Jon Lord Commander of his Kingsguard after the war against the Others. That's really all you need to know. This is just a scene with them in King's Landing after the war, when Stannis is busy running the kingdom. No real spoilers for anything. Thanks to

outboxed for coming up for a title, because I am unfortunately too dumb for titles.

Jon straightened his back as he watched – tried not to watch – his king undress. Stannis disliked having servants around him all day, and he only ever let his squires help him dress and undress when he was wearing armour. Jon was quiet. He knew that the last thing Stannis needed after a long day was more talking.

He wasn't happy, Jon knew. Wasn't happier as king than he had been fighting for the throne. Jon had heard Lord Tyrell grumble a while back, complaining, wondering why Stannis had even fought so hard for a throne that didn't seem to bring him any joy now that he had it. Lord Tarly had replied that it must have been a matter of pride, of principle, that a man like Stannis Baratheon wouldn't just back away from his rights. Jon had smiled. They all didn't understand. It had never been about happiness nor even so much about his rights for Stannis, but about duty. The throne was his duty, and Stannis Baratheon was not a man to leave his own burdens to others.

Remembering that helped Jon whenever he missed the North, whenever the intrigues of the court made him wish he had remained a simple man of the Night's Watch. Just like the king belonged to the realm, Jon belonged to his king. His place was where Stannis went, whether it was the Wall during the war, King's Landing now, or even Storm's End that one time he had accompanied Stannis to his family's castle. His joyless, dour king had become as much his home as Winterfell or the Wall had once been. Maybe even more so, because unlike his family and unlike the Night's Watch, Stannis truly wanted him. Jon was here because Stannis had chosen him, not because he had nowhere else to go.

He averted his eyes from Stannis' bare chest. Once he had looked away for fear of Stannis noticing his thoughts, but it was almost worse now, knowing that Stannis knew, knowing that his king might not even forbid him to look. There was a quiet understanding between them about this thing, whatever it was, an understanding that they both wanted the same, but that it would never happen. That it wouldn't even be mentioned.

"You're quiet today," Stannis observed when he was done changing. He took a sip of lemon water from his cup, blue eyes meeting Jon's in the dim light of his bed chambers.

"I did not wish to disturb you, Your Grace."

"It wouldn't hurt me to hear something sensible at least once a day," Stannis snorted. Jon would have smiled at the grumpy tone, but he knew that Stannis was more discontent than usual. Lord Davos had been gone for two weeks now, tending to his lands and visiting his family. Stannis missed his Hand sorely, Jon knew, a void that even Jon's presence couldn't fill.

"Something sensible, Your Grace, would be for you to get some rest." Jon made sure not to sound too worried, knowing that Stannis hated that. His king slept only a few hours every night, and restlessly at that. Sometimes Jon wished he could just stay with him for the night, some childish part of him hoping that his presence alone would soothe Stannis' nightmares and concerns, but he could very well imagine his king's reaction if he ever suggested it. The mocking words, the insulted tone asking if he was a little child who couldn't be left alone in the dark.

For once Stannis didn't argue with him. There was a knock on the door before Jon could say any more. Ser Rolland Storm, come to relieve Jon for the night. The King's Bastards, some people called them, and the disrespect, not towards them, but towards Stannis, always made Jon bristle. But of course those lordlings would complain about Stannis' chosing two bastards for his Kingsguard, picking them over the trueborn sons of great houses. Ser Rolland would stay outside and guard the door for the night, while Jon would return to the White Tower. Truth be told, he needed the rest himself. Keeping up with Stannis was no easy task.

As if he hadn't heard the knock, Stannis walked over to Jon, standing too close to him, nothing inappropriate, but just a bit closer than he stood to other people. It always made Jon's heart jump a little, with a mixture of fear and awe and longing.

"You look tired," Stannis said, his voice the smallest bit softer than before. Such a meaningless little sentence, but coming from Stannis it meant so much more. Meant that he had even bothered to look, bothered to notice, bothered to care. On most days, Stannis looked at him the way he looked at a subject, a servant, a knight sworn to him by duty. Sometimes he seemed to see a trusted advisor in him, maybe even a friend, and then there were those moments in which Stannis looked at him like a man, full of a longing he would never admit to.

But it were these moments Jon cherished most, when Stannis looked at him like a father would look at his son, stern, but concerned, caring. Like Jon mattered to him beyond being a loyal knight and advisor. Jon wanted to say something, wanted to touch Stannis, but he did not want to risk getting pushed away. So he bit back his smile and met Stannis' eyes, calm and serious, just quietly showing that he understood all the words Stannis left unspoken. This was all they would ever allow themselves, but it was enough, because somewhere between looks and half-sentences and unsaid words, they understood each other.

It had to be enough.

His king nodded and stepped away.

"I will see you in the morning, Ser Jon."

"Your Grace." Jon bowed and turned to leave. The dismissal had been as harsh as always, all warmth gone from Stannis' voice. Yet he felt his king's eyes following him, and allowed himself to smile.

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This is brilliant! The intimacy that's fostered through understanding is right on and the fact that there is a physicality to it but that it's something so contrained is just how it should be (most days). You get Stannis' understated (and sometimes oddly backhanded) affection so right as well.

unlike his family and unlike the Night's Watch, Stannis truly wanted him. Jon was here because Stannis had chosen him, not because he had nowhere else to go.

Oh, hi perfection, how are you today? And, just yes, because this is what Jon needs: he needs to be valued by someone who actually sees his worth, he needs to be more than a problem people need to deal with (which is what he always was, really, even for Ned and even in the Night's Watch, to a large extent).

Also, shout out for the Bastard of Nightsong. The detail of his being there and of there being some muttering about Stannis' having raised bastards to his Kingsguard is wonderfully apt. I love that Jon finds it difficult because the dissent implies a criticism of Stannis because that is just so Jon, he can go beyond personal insult (he's grown well past that) but they are misjudging Stannis and that's what matters (and the fact that it is, in some way, his fault would only make it more frustrating for him).

But, yes, this is just wonderful. The surpressed smile and the 'Ser Jon' - which is just propriety, on one level, but, on another, is about Stannis saying that Jon belongs here. ;lfdhg;gfs

I'm so, so happy you liked it because I basically wrote this for you. So yay! :D

There are so many things I love about them, and I tried to put all of that into this fic, and I'm so glad that you noticed pretty much all of it. It really IS incredible how we pretty much see this pairing the same way.

I just like the Bastard of Nightsong being on the Kingsguard. And of course people would grumble and complain, and of course Jon would mind (while I imagine Rolland as the kind of guy who'd think it's hilarious).

Squeeeee, your comment made me ridiculously happy. :D And Jon should definitely be Ser Jon. ^^

Oh, the manpain :D These two are so good at this.

It's their big specialty. ;) Thanks for reading.

I just love how Jon "gets" Stannis - his craving for duty rather than power or anything baser, that impels him towards the throne. And I love the general mutual understanding between them, and the unrequited angst on Jon's part.

This pairing. :D

It's one of the things I love so much about them, how they just understand each other without having to talk much.

I KNOW RIGHT? ;) Thanks for commenting. ^^

Oh my goooooood I am in such a weird mood today that this whole thing made my eyes all teary :') I love it. It's so simple and powerful at the same time.

Goddamnit, I swear I am going to gather all my strengths to force the HBO producers to put this on screen some day, even if it would be one minute scene, I don't care :D but I am afraid it would be too much awesomennes for me to handle. :D

Anyway, as has been said, perfect.

Thank you so much. :D And Stannis has a way of making people cry. He's so awesome and tragic.

Kingsguard!Jon with King Stannis generally needs to happen. I love this verse so much, and it makes me ridiculously sad that it won't happen in canon. Noooooo.

I got a Stannis stamp of approval. I'm so honoured. :D

I just got around to reading this, for some reason! GAH.

You've captured this complex relationship so perfectly. Part king and sworn sword, part friend, part father/son and master/protege, and then with a healthy dose of UST. I LOVE IT. Who else could be this complicated but Jon and Stannis?

The line about Davos really piqued my interest. I would love to see these three interacting in this 'verse. What does Davos think of Jon and of all this? How do Stannis's views of Jon and Davos differ? Is Jon kinda jealous of Davos? So much potential for a complicated USTfest. xD

Thank you so much. :D I love how complex their relationship is, how many different layers there are to it. There are just so many different kinds of trust and affection and devotion between them. I'm so glad that it came through in the fic. I'd hate to simplify their relationship.

That's an interesting question, and I only realised now that I've never written the three of them together. I don't really think there'd be a conflict between Davos and Jon. Neither of them is the jealous type, I think, and I think they'd both jsut be glad that somebody else loves Stannis as well. With Jon, I could see some sort of "I'm not worthy and Stannis loves Davos so much more than me" feeling, but generally I think the three of them would get along great.
But I do think it would be incredibly interesting to explore how Davos sees Jon, or what differences there may be, from Stannis' POV, between his relationship with Jon and his relationship with Davos. You just gave me so, so many ideas for fic (and of course I'd also love you forever if you write something about them ;)).
I think a bigger problem for Jon would be Stannis' marriage to Sansa, which is also part of my headcanon. I don't think he'd feel bad for loving Stannis just like Davos loves him, but he would definitely feel somewhat guilty for loving his sister's husband just a bit too much. ;)

I think Davos would see a lot of Stannis in Jon. He would like him because he's a "good lad" in general, but mostly for the similarities he sees between them. I thought there may be a smidgen of jealousy on Jon's part, but I think the "not worthy" feeling you described is more accurate. Young!Jon would've been jealous, but that was then.

OHH, I'd forgotten about the Sansa component! Have you written anything with those two interacting? I'd love to see that in action.

I definitely need to get back to writing Stannis fic. My brain is only producing Samwell and Harry Potter stuff at the moment. Whyyyyy. v.v

Ah, yes, I love the idea that Davos would see some of Stannis in Jon (and it fits with the whole theme of Jon being a bit like the son Stannis never had). It would definitely make him like Jon, but I think mostly he'd just be glad that there is someone else who respects Stannis for whom he is, and someone else Stannis can trust (and who isn't a crazy priestess ;)).
As for Jon, I suppose it IS jealousy in a way. I just meant that it wouldn't be the malicious kind of jealousy. He'd never want to take away what Stannis and Davos have, he'd never want Stannis to go without that. He doesn't want to replace Davos. But I can see him wishing that his relationship with Stannis could one day become as close as what Stannis has with Davos, while at the same time angsting that he's so not worthy of that. ;)

I once wrote a tiny little scene of them meeting for some silly LJ meme, in about 5 minutes. Let me see if I can find that again. But I haven't written anything longer about them yet, although I've been meaning to do that for ages. I LOVE Stannis/Sansa more than is strictly healthy, and I still haven't written them. ;) So I think it would be a bit awkward for Jon, especially considering that Stannis and Sansa would be rather happy together in the long term, the way I see them.

You should do that. There'll be another comment fic meme next week, maybe some prompts there will inspire you? :D

~~
There, found the Stannis/Sansa thingy. It's not very long and kinda shitty, now that I reread it, but here you go:

Sansa went to a knee, not daring to look up.
"Your Grace." She couldn't keep her voice from trembling.
"My lady." A gruff voice, harsh and with not a hint of warmth in it. "Rise, I will not have my queen kneel for me."
He didn't offer her his hand. She rose and cast a shy look at her king, still struggling with the thought that she was to marry him. He was tall and so lean he seemed almost gaunt, even in armour, nothing like his fat late brother. Nothing like his handsome younger brother either: only a fringe was left of his black hair, his face was hollow, all sharp lines and tense muscles, frowns and scowls. His eyes were frighteningly intense, as piercing as Lord Tywin's, a terrifying determination in them that made her wonder no longer how this man had conquered Westeros against all odds. But they were the same deep, dark blue as Lord Renly's, a warm colour, and she reminded herself that this was not Tywin Lannister, but the man who had defeated him, who had executed both Queen Cersei and King Joffrey, who had avenged her father's, her mother's, her brother's murder, who had found Bran and Rickon and restored Winterfell to them. He did not seem kind, but they said he was just, and she knew she owed him her freedom from the Lannisters.
"I ..." she started, since the king did apparently not mean to break the silence. "I promise I will be a good wife to you, Your Grace."
"Nobody could ever accuse the Starks of not being dutiful," he replied, still as gruffly, but she had the feeling, or just the hope, that it was his attempt at saying something nice. "I know you are not happy about this. No, don't flatter me and pretend otherwise," he cut her short before she could even interrupt."But you have my word that you have nothing to fear now, neither from me nor from others."
Lord Stannis is a hard man, she remembered her father say, it seemed a lifetime ago. But he is a man of honour.
If there was one thing Sansa had learnt since she had left Winterfell, it was that nothing was more deceiving than a man's appearance. She brought a small smile to her lips, and it was not entirely feigned.
"That is more than I dared to hope for in the last months, Your Grace."
He stared at her for a moment, always meeting her eyes, his gaze never straying to her body as other men's did, and merely nodded.

Yes, I will definitely watch for the comment fic meme!

Oh, shit. I think I ship it now. There's SO MUCH going on in that short scene: Sansa's gratitude, Stannis's protection, the comfort Sansa takes in Stannis not oogling her.... And finally, Sansa can stop pretending.

And of course, no Stannis writing is complete without a beautiful description of his face and eyes. <3 I see why you ship this so hard- it's so layered and complex! Even just this little bit showed that. I'd assume their relationship gets simplified as time goes on- they come to trust each other, love each other after a fashion, etc.

Yay! You wrote some awesome stuff last time around, I remember. :D

THAT IS AWESOME! Because I'm trying to get veryone to ship these two. ;) I really think it would help a lot that Stannis, unlike all other men Sansa has been around recently (Sandor, Tyrion, LF, and just about every other guy), would not look at her like she's just some pretty girl he wants to bang. It's not that Stannis doesn't find her attractive, because I'm sure he does, but he would never allow himself to show it, not even towards his own bride. And I think she'd just feel safer with him not perving on her. And she would appreciate that he wants honesty and not polite phrases.

I had so much fun writing that description. ;) And, yeah, their relationship will get simpler over time. I honestly think they could be fairly happy together. Stannis has all the really important traits Sansa wants in a man, even if he's lacking the good looks and the easy courtesies. And I think Sansa could actually get through to Stannis over time, through the lobster-y, distant demeanour down to the man who just never expected to be loved by anyone. Of course, their relationship would still be a disaster if they had no sons, but that would just be too much bad luck even for Stannis. And I think once they'd have children, things would only get better for them.

sorry for the rant. oO I love this ship so much, but somehow I haven't got around yet to writing actual fic, so I need to put all my feelings and thoughts into long rants. I guess I just have no idea how to write het, least of all since I'd have to write porn - their wedding night is just way too important for their dynamics to skip it.

If there's one thing I've learned in two games of scoring all the fic (and thus READING all the fic, lol), it's that there is almost no ship or pairing that can't be written well, whether I agree with it or not. This is not a ship/pairing I agree with. But the way you write it is fantastic. Everything about it makes sense except for the fact that it's not real, if you take my meaning--or, to put it another way, if this WERE canon, you'd have written it perfectly.

And what a great first post! I'm super stoked to have another awesome writer in my House. XD

(101 + 20) x 1.15 for first post bonus = 139 points to House Lannister!

Haha, thank you, I guess? I never would have thought I'd ship this before ASOS, but their interactions in the books are just so priceless.

Thanks. ^^

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Fic: A Place to Stand (Stannis/Jon)

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