OMFG BEST SENTENCE EVER!!!!!

[linndechir]

"Et c'est ainsi, le cul encore plein de sperme, que je me résolus à entrer au Sicherheitsdienst."
"And thus, with my arse still full of sperm, I decided to join the Sicherheitsdienst."
- Jonathan Littel, Les Bienveillantes

OMFG THIS BOOK IS MADE OF FUCKING WIN!!!! Oh GOD!

Okay, I admit it, I only read 100 of the 1300 pages so far, and maybe it's going to suck after 300 pages, because there aren't many authors who can write good books of this length. Far too often it gets boring and repetitive after a few hundred pages. But the beginning is amazing. For those of you who've never heard of it, Les Bienveillantes (English title: The Kindly Ones, which sounds stupid), is the memoirs of a fictitious SS-officier named Maximilien Aue, written by an American author who's writing in French. It's weird to read about Nazis speaking French all the time, honestly. oO Still, Aue is as gay as you can possibly get. 100 pages and already two graphic slash scenes, not to mention this amazing sentence I quoted above (the English translation is by me, I was too lazy to look up how it was really translated). Context? Right after he had some random boy fuck him, his future BFF convinces him to join the SD. Not to mention that his name is Max (like Stierlitz!), he smokes all the fucking time (like Stierlitz, and like Hellstrom!), he's gay and such a sub, and he has a best friend on whom he seems to have a total crush. Well, not crush, but he wants to do him. Not to mention the countless mentions of Heydrich and Schellenberg being suspiciously good friends - this book does not help my recent fascination with historical slash. Bad brain, very very bad! And there I thought it couldn't possibly get worse!
What I really want to say, though, is the following: read this book. I shouldn't, because I really don't have the time, but it's just great so far. At least read the first part, Toccata, which is just great, and only fifty pages long. It's worth the time, even if you don't want to read the entire book. Now let's just hope that I won't be disappointed by the rest.

Other news ... I quit my job, because I'm tired of working on every Saturday, and since I don't desperately need the money, why should I keep doing this? It's a pity, it was a nice job, as far as crappy-jobs-for-students-so-I-can-afford-my-decadent-lifestyle go, with nice colleagues and relatively well paid and not far away from where I live, but still. I want a week-end that consists of two days. Even if it means having a bit less money.

Am also neglecting university stuff. Again. This week is going to be stressful. Which also means that I probably won't post a new fic too soon, but I'll do my best. I'm considering to write some Hellstrom/Wicki, set around 1930, which would be very very angsty and tragic and sweet and beautiful and extremely tragic and sad. With obligatory Landa/Hellstrom-references, mind you. ;)

Ooooh, and I bought the most amazing new leather boots! Rawr! Love them! (I should get Hellstrom out of my head when I go shopping ...)

Comments

[sevenwindows.livejournal.com]

LOLOLOLOL that is the line my work friend/book club of two recced this book to me with. Most inappropriate of workplace conversations, bless him. I still haven't read it - its bulk works against it, poor book.

YYY to Hellstrom/Wicki! They would be lovely and tragic. ;_;

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Well, I don't have the time to read it either. I have lots of other stuff to read for my classes, and fics to write, and other things to do ... but I just couldn't resist when I was told about the gay main character. ;) It will probably take me ages to finish reading it, but it's worth it. Guh! And while this is really the best sentence so far, there were quite a few other lines that made me laugh out loud. :D

Yeeeeeeeeeessss, so tragic. I'm thinking student!Dieter and about 30-year-old Wicki, with naughty Dieter seducing a rather repressed Wicki ... and they'd have a very sweet relationship for a while, and Dieter would try to get Wicki the right papers so he can stay in Germany, and Wicki would try to convince Dieter to leave Germany with him, and in the end they'd have to realise that they just can't stay together ... I just want the picture of them hugging a last time before Wicki leaves, maybe in 1934 or something, with Dieter in uniform because he just came from work, and Wicki crying on his uniform and all sad that his beloved Dieter is working for the guys who make him leave his country ... And all the while Wicki's gentleness will be a stark contrast to Landa, who in that version already met student!Dieter and started toying with him. I want to write this so fucking much!

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

OMFG YESSSSSSSSSS!!! I just pre-ordered the English version (due out February 2-the day before my 52nd birthday.) Horrible English title, I agree, but it sounds as though this will be a classic in the canon of gay smut. BTW, if you haven't yet read Aaron Travis, probably the greatest writer of gay smut ever, you don't know what you're missing. "Blue Light" is a masterpiece.

[acidpenguin46.livejournal.com]

I completely agree with the title of this post. (Also, damn it, woman! I still have to watch 17 Moments of Spring, and you're throwing more Nazi slash at me. ;p)

Also, Hellstrom/Wicki/Landa for the win. *coughs* I mean, I could read some Hellstrom/Wicki beautiful man pain.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Haha, sorry. I haven't finished watching 17 Moments myself, to be honest. I really don't have the time for all this stuff, but but but it's stronger than me. Worst thing? It makes me want historical nazi slash. Not about fluffy cute Nazis played by August Diehl, but about real nazis. And that's just a little bit sick. ;)

There won't be a threesome, unless I come up with a great idea. ;) Nah, my pre-war Wicki is too sweet and nice to be in the same room with Landa. ;) But, yeah, Hellstrom/Wicki man pain, there'll be a lot of that. I'm so glad some people approve of the idea. ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I thought the English version was already published? *keeps crying about the butchering of the beautiful title*
Don't throw more books at me, I have strictly no time to read them. ;) I'll put it on the list of "1000 books I should read but won't any time soon because I have no fucking time." ;)

[sevenwindows.livejournal.com]

WICKI ;_;

You should definitely write this. :D Om nom nom bb!Dieter is in sooooo much trouble & Landa finds him so pretty when he's all secretive and terrified. ;D

[acidpenguin46.livejournal.com]

Damn those Nazis. They take up so much time (because yeah, that is by far the worst thing about Nazis. ;p) Awww, August. I'm not going to be able to think about him without the phrase "fluffy cute Nazi" popping into my mind now.

The world needs more Hellstrom/Wicki man pain (or even just Hellstrom man pain - he cries so prettily.) And I definitely approve!

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

Landa/Max y/y?
I've read a few hundred pages in, and had to stop because fuck, uni reading list. I really want to get back to it but it's a book I realy need a holiday for. I've already reserved a place for Max in my Nazi harem though XD

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

Actually, who is Wicki? Where's he from?

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for the support! I was really afraid nobody would want to read this insanity.
I think Landa at that time would be a tiny little bit nicer to him than in my other fics, because bb!Dieter is just so cute not even Landa can resist snuggling him. But, yeah, he'd enjoy himself when little Dieter starts an affair with this pretty Wicki-guy and is all secretive about it and scared that Landa might find out, and even more terrified when Landa does find out ... except that Landa isn't angry, he just finds it amusing. ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Of course, bad bad bad Nazis. ;) Well, actually Zoller is the "fluffy cute Nazi", but Hellstrom (without the awful hair) is fluffy and cute too. A snuggle!Nazi, so to speak. damn, this won't help my annoying habit of calling him Dieterchen (diminutive of Dieter) all the time. ;)

The world needs more Wicki man pain! The poor guy had such a crappy past and nobody writes about it! And they'll cry together. Especially Dieter, when he's losing his fluffy Wicki and has no choice but to stay with not-so-fluffy Landa. ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I don't know who I want to ship him with more, Landa or Hellstrom. Although I really can't call him Max, because then I have to think of Max Otto von Stierlitz (damn, I have to upload a Stierlitz picspam to spread his awesomeness).
My Nazi harem is growing by the day, it's scary. ;) And with all the tops running around there, little sub!Maximilien (ah, this works better ;)) will definitely enjoy himself. I don't really have the time to read it either, but as usual I'm neglecting my uni stuff. Bad me. It will probably take me ages to finish the book.

Wicki is a minor minor minor character in Inglourious Basterds. The German basterd who translated for Raine? http://www.nolapeles.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/bastardos-sin-gloria-Cpl.Wilhelm-WickiGedeon-Burkhard.jpg Who happens to be played by my favourite actor from when I was, like, eight years old, which is why I absolutely love him? ;)

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

Landa/Hellstrom/Maximillian threesome y/y/y/y/y/y/y?
Ah, see, for me that character is just a Basterd, and those can just die wholesale in a fire so I set my Nazi characters on them, thinking to watch some torture porn, only to find that they're so disgusted that they just shoot them outright and go home to play darts or something.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Definitely! Landa/Hellstrom/Maximilien/Max foursome? http://www.kino-teatr.ru/movie/kadr/6348/11164.jpg
Heh, I like Wicki, but, again, that's maybe just because I love his actor to no end. And his background fascinates me. *shrug* (And I won't apologise for finding Wicki/Hellstrom fucking hot. ;)) If it's any comfort, it would be about Wicki ten years before he becomes a basterd. ;)

[zigsternenstaub.livejournal.com]

OMG I HAVE THAT BOOK! I got it as a gift a few months back after much whining about not having enough money to buy it (it goes for 40$ in Canada). I'm dying to read it, but never had the time when I was at school. Now I shall begin, because it seems even more awesome now than it did before!

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

At least the beginning is awesome, I can tell you that. Don't know about the rest yet, but let's hope for the best. So, yes, you should definitely read it!
I hope you're feeling better already. :)

[zigsternenstaub.livejournal.com]

I shall start tonight.

I'm feeling a bit better. Still maudlin, but better.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Yay! Be sure to tell me what you think! :D

Well, that's a start, right? *sends hugs, cookies, and gay nazis*

[zigsternenstaub.livejournal.com]

Yay! Be sure to tell me what you think! :D

I shall!

*sends hugs, cookies, and gay nazis*

And drow weapon masters in love with human assassins! I have been re-reading Kindred Spirits, and I hope that you shall be posting a new chapter soon! Boo to Inglourious Basterds that seem to have stolen your fannish heart.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I'm sorryyyy. Really. Landa/Hellstrom have eaten my brain. I really want to continue KS soon, but whenever I start writing Hellstrom glares Zak and Artemis away and threatens to put them in a camp if they interfere. And we can't have that. I'm really sorry, but I will continue it. It's not dead, it's only delayed.

LOL

[assassin-nariel.livejournal.com]

One glare from Artemis would send Dieterchen to his knees, licking his boots. Leather all the way? Herro-o?
And I can just see them trying to arrest Zak. uuuuuuu *handwave* Bullets? Lulz? I see heads raining! Yaaaaarg, Zak in The Bride mode.

Re: LOL

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Lol, my ass. Zak would go like, "omfg I attack you!" and then they'd shoot him. Now Zak is fast, but he can't dodge bullets. Not several. This is not James Bond, remember? :P
And of course Dieter would like Artemis' boots. And when they're done, he'd make sure Artemis gets shot. I can't risk that. Stfu. :P

[acidpenguin46.livejournal.com]

N'awww. *sends Wicki to snuggle Dieterchen* This is one of those times I wished that I had the talent of drawing, because I can just picture this cartoon version of Landa and Hellstrom skipping and holding hands, with love hearts all around them. My brain is a strange place.

I've never really thought about Wicki's past to be honest, but now that you mention it, it would have been an incredibly difficult one.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Yay! Wicki/Dieterchen snuggle, I approve! If your brain is a strange place, so is mine, because I fully approve of this picture. It's what lol!Landa and lol!Hellstrom do in my head all the time. Sometimes they even sing Romeo&Juliet from Reefer Madness (if you haven't seen that movie, you should watch it right now. and then imagine Landa/Hellstrom in this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rO-CN9lJvYo It's scary as hell. The only thing even scarier is imagining Hitler and Goebbels singing that song. ;))

Maybe it's because I love Gedeon so much. ;) I just thought that it must have been hard for him to leave the country he grew up him, the country he considers his home, just because a bunch of stupid idiots took over and decided that omfg he's Jewish and oh-so-evil. Okay, I admit it - I just want believable Wicki/Dieter-porn. :P