NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN!!!!!

[linndechir]

This is getting fucking frustrating! Everyone around me is posting their Hanukkah fics, and my stupid fic still refuses to get written. Even the first draft isn't finished, because whenever I try to work on it, it gets more fucked up. First, I made the participating characters even more insane than they already are. Then, I decided to use flashbacks - I HATE flashbacks, I've never written any because I hate reading them, but my brainless fic idea only works with flashbacks. And as if all that wasn't bad enough, one of my characters suddenly started quoting Hegel. WHAT THE FUCK??? I'm not even writing about Landa, for God's sake! I'm starting to think that I should delete the whole thing and start anew, but I have honestly no better idea for the prompt I was given than the one I'm using now. It's actually a good idea, I think, except that it's so weird that it only makes sense in my brain, but not when I write it. Whatever, I'll just pretend my lack of sense and clarity is artistic and mysterious and complex. Or something. I just want to write something better than pointless porn with the pairing and the kinks my giftee asked for. :(
The worst thing is that I waited so long to write this because when I came up with this idea weeks ago, I was sure that I could easily write it down in two days, and voilà. But, no, everything always turns out to be ten times more complicated.
Why the fuck is he quoting Hegel? Seriously, Hegel? In bed? Not even IB characters should be so fucked up that they start lecturing their partner on philosophy and freedom during sex. *smashes head against the wall*

Comments

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I could, but I think the same problem would occur again. :(

True, true, but it's not Landa. I don't want to say who it is, because I don't want to reveal who I'm writing about and in what situation, but I can tell you that it's not Landa. So there's no excuse. ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I hate flashbacks. *cries* They sound stupid, and pretentious, and ugly, and they fuck up the best story. But for some reason my brain keeps insisting on them.

Maybe I should introduce Landa into the story! That would solve all problems. ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

I will have to finish it. I'll just imagine Heydrich kicking my ass, or something. And not the way I like it. ;)

I have no idea. I was innocently writing my fic, and suddenly this character bursts out with a Hegel quote that seemed suddenly perfectly appropriate for the situation. The fact that it's one of my favourite quotes does not make this any better.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Until Saturday evening.

Well, it's not an exact quote as written by Hegel, but it's a very often used sentence that resumes his theories about freedom. I only know the German version, "Freiheit ist Einsicht in die Notwendigkeit", I'm still struggling to translate this properly into English.

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

It all depends upon the character who's quoting Hegel and how deeply he's within the throes of passion. But please don't let it be that pasty-faced Heydrich. I have no problem with you using real-life Nazis (and I'm a Jew who had relatives killed at Babi Yar), but at least Mengele's good-looking, albeit probably not bright enough. But then, Nazi uniform fetish and all, I am one twisted fuck. :-)

[zoi-no-miko.livejournal.com]

.... I think this sounds like the most amazing fic ever. XD

Good luck? *feeds your bunnies chocolate covered coffee beans*

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Actually, it sounds like the weirdest stuff I've ever written. But your confidence honours and motivates me. :D

*takes the chocolate covered coffee beans and attacks her bitchy characters and their issues*

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Oh, c'mon, Heydrich is hot! Not beautiful, no, everything looks wrong in his face. He SHOULDN'T be hot. But then you realise that he has the most gorgeous, erotic hands ever ... and you take a closer look at him and notice his "come hither"-stare, not to mention his smile ... and you read about him and realise that his personality is so fascinating it makes your head spin ... And at some point you realise once more that attractiveness has nothing to do with eyes that are too small, and a nose that is too big, and a generally weird face. :)
Anyway ... I'll stop drooling now ... but this fic is not about Heydrich, don't worry. It's pure IB, no real Nazis in this one.

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

My Mengele character takes umbridge at this.
Philosophical question; is it worse for you (a Jew) to like nazis, or me (a descendant of collaborators)?

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

At least you guys all have an excuse. You can say, "Oh, I'm allowed to make jokes about this/drool at Nazis/whatever; I can't possibly be one myself!" I'm like Hitler's poster girl; people get all the wrong ideas when I say stuff like that. ;)
(Somehow that reminds me of this joke ... "My grandfather died in a camp ... He fell from a watchtower." :))

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

I love that joke ;)

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

So do I. I feel the constant urge to tell it everywhere and to everyone, but I'm afraid most people would give me outraged looks. *sigh*

[septemberoses.livejournal.com]

Personally, I think it sounds like you're too smart. Hear me out: you know a lot of things, and as a writer you have to decide whether just because you know something, and it's perfect for the fic, it's appropriate. I'm constantly writing things in and then taking them out.

Also, I wonder whether you're just essentially unhappy with the assignment (porn featuring two characters you don't care about?) If the fic is a "job" then why not get it over with as quickly as possible, within the parameters that your porn-hungry giftee desires? I'll just take a stab that the request didn't include anything highbrow :)

Fic requests, even if I volunteered, are so hard I'm basically not doing it any more. Even things I *want* to write experience some sort of kiss of death when I feel obligated to write them.

I am sure this helps not one bit.

[linndechir.livejournal.com]

Happy to hear from you again! I was actually going to ask you to beta read it once it's done, if you don't mind. ;)

The problem is not that I think it's inappropriate for the situation or the character. Strangely enough, I think it's extremely fitting (and it's not like I wrote it to show everyone my pretty quote ;)). I was just surprised because I didn't expect this to happen, I didn't expect him to say anything even remotely profound in that situation. Ah, I don't know. I was just weirded out by myself. One of these "WTF what are my characters doing?"-moments, I'm sure you know what I mean.

The problem is that the giftee doesn't want brainless porn. She did ask for a pairing and certain kinks, but I don't think she just wants these characters to have quick sex in a corner and get it over with. I'm not unhappy with the assignment, I'm unhappy with my way of handling it. Mhm, I'll just force myself to write something tomorrow, and then see how I can polish that draft. (Except that I wanted to write at least the first draft yesterday and today, and failed.)

I find it incredibly difficult to write for prompts as well, which is why I usually don't do it. In this case, though, it was a prompt exchange, and I thought that writing a fic for someone else wasn't so bad if it meant getting a fic I wanted written. :)

[skull-bearer.livejournal.com]

I've started a game where I go up to random people and turn the topic to nazi jokes and see how long it is before I can get them to laugh at something really repulsive. I got a group of anime fans to joke at the idea of dressing up as nazis and streaking a group of Holocaust survivors.

[cat-irix.livejournal.com]

Aye aye. *nods, dreamy-eyed* :) Anyway, good luck with the fic! I think that quoting philosophical quotes in bed is hot, and I know a few RL people who would totally do it.

And LOL at the watchtower joke ;) I love these kinds of jokes.

[sevenwindows.livejournal.com]

I can see certain characters going all rambly and philosophical after sex, in a not-quite-aware-he-isn't-making-sense way. But then certain characters read epic Middle German poetry in a fucking basement bar. :) (lol, giving this actual thought: Hegel is not the first thing that comes to mind, but it'd be almost cliche to have Dieter quoting Nietzsche so Hegel'd be more surprising & interesting. Especially if he's still a radical atheist...) On the other hand, if it's HUGO quoting anybody I really don't know where he gets it from. ;)

[machiavelli-imp.livejournal.com]

...from previous encounters with Dieter? :)

I can see a particularly manipulative (Hellstrom, Landa) or sociopathic (Stiglitz) character stopping halfway though the sex to have a rambling philosophical discussion, especially if there is a distinct power dynamic in which they top. Stiglitz not so much unless he's on top of some random SS/SD officer and going to kill him after the sex, because there's a convincing case for mad rambling about the switch in power there.

If it's a prompt that wants an R-rated fic but not PWP, I think it is possible to write something elegant if the sex is non-gratuitous, if each action shows a precise facet of the central characters minds'. Of course this is all easier said than done.

[machiavelli-imp.livejournal.com]

There were T-shirts for sale in Australia with that joke on them ("My grandfather died at [insert KL name here]" on the front and "He fell out of a guard tower" on the back, but if one was caught wearing one in public one had to do several months of community service.)

Philosophy is far hotter and more meaningful than the usual post-coital drivel that one sees on TV shows or reads in books (which I am going to blame on the popularity of American culture, since I am a pretentious arse). On the other hand, if someone is capable of speaking after sex then in an ideal world they've probably picked the wrong partner. (*cough* Yeah, sure, totally realistic expectation. *cough*)

[machiavelli-imp.livejournal.com]

(http://www.mynetimages.com)

[cat-irix.livejournal.com]

What a great T-shirt idea! Now I wonder if this joke would be just as funny if it were not offensive to the majority. (Currently contemplating if there's any social occasion which could warrant wearing a Rammstein T-shirt with the infamous "Stacheldraht im Harnkanal" quote :)

Intellectual discussions during sex are hot... AND if it's brutal & violent dub-con sex, doubly so! *pokes Linn* ;)

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

Who knows. We all share in the same twisted fuckery. Okay, now I wanna read whatever you've written about Mengele, who was definitely handsome--but his experiments were so fucking stupid and pointless! I mean, seriously, they are the equivalent of Bart Simpson's evil twin sewing together the rat and bird. Jesus, if you're gonna have human subjects, at least do some decent experiments on them, like the CIA and the American military! :-D

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

I love this!!! But the only good-looking guy is the one on the right, and even there we can't see his whole face. But the haircut...the haircut..!

Himmler. What a twat. Every time I see that pudgy little face I actually do feel ashamed for liking SS uniforms. And only because he's so incredibly ugly!!

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

Yes, you are a bit on the Wagnerian side! Yes, we can do "Springtime for Hitler" and get away with it. And twisted as I am, I do like that joke. I myself am a mongrel, who has her Christmas and Hanukkah too. A classic Deborah utterance oft-repeated in my family is a remark I made to my father when he hadn't eaten all his Hanukkah candy one year: "Will you eat that goddamn Maccabee? It's Christmas, for Christ's sake!"

[deborahkla.livejournal.com]

Yep, his face is all fucked-up. Strangely enough, he looks like the one blonde among my siblings, my sister Ann. Same giant Jew-lips all out of proportion with the rest of the face. But I think it's more that I don't like pallid blonde men. Now pallid blonde women like Catherine Deneuve and Jessica Lange, that's another story. But I like my Aryan men to be butch and golden and tawny like rampant lions, with that wonderful pink-gold skin.